Asking for a friend

  • DarkAri@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 hours ago

    The number who will be accepting of it is probably like 15% or so. This is the amount of women who identify as bisexual, which probably is about the same as women who view feminine men as attractive. It really depends. If you are feminine but still masculine in ways, you might actually have the majority of women liking you. I am a very andro guy for example when I guy mode and also fairly attractive and nearly half of women I meet show some interest in me although usually not knowing that Im actually trans. If you are decent looking and take care of yourself. Eat well, wear sunscreen outside, things like this. However when you are doing it in a very open sort of way, half of women just won’t have attraction and probably 2/3rds of the ones who do will be too afraid of the social ramifications to actually admit they like you and pursue it. You can also be andro without being very girly. A guy wearing a skirt is kind of weird. You are better off actually growing your hair out and leaning more into one side of the other. Either be a pretty guy, or a pretty girl. You can do both on different days. You can mix them in ways but you have to have a good eye for it. Things like skinny jeans, nice cut shirts, long hair, shaving your body, jewelry, women shoes, these types of things can fit well into a more masculine style. If you are wearing a skirt though you should probably be looking more like a girl then a guy in your face and stuff. At that point you probably want to dress mostly fem and maybe incorporate some guy style into your style if youd like. Tshirts, beanies, hoodies, skate shoes whatever.

    Regardless that is still tens of millions of people, your chances aren’t impossible. Women don’t care about this stuff nearly as much as guys do. They don’t feel as awkward about it. Most women who have a strong distaste of it are probably on the dumber side anyways. They will make bad partners. They are also probably gold diggers and stuff. Those traits tend to run together. Also as we move into the future it’s only going to become more common because humans are naturally fairly bi and gender fluid by nature outside of the conditioning and gender ideology pushed by some people. Feminine men are honestly just superior in nearly every way to modern male styles and it will keep coming back. Men dressing the way they do is a very modern concept. Outside of the Middle East and Arab cultures men didn’t even like having beards or anything. It used to be a sign of laziness and trashiness. Men nowadays are pretty insecure about their masculinity. They drive around in rich people trucks and live lifestyles of extreme wealth, and play video games and work in offices, and stuff and so they project their own insecurities onto other men. Most men who are actually manly men don’t give af about someone being gender fluid or anything. It’s really the spoiled ones who are like that. Women mostly don’t like it because of physical attraction, and because many women idolize the idea of being a housewife and marrying a rich man who will take care of them and stuff. I know none of this has anything to do a guy dressing fem, but many people are really dumb and they think those things are linked. They never really consider that a man who is fem is incredibly brave and value and principles driven. They are very likely to be someone who actually takes care of someone. To be a good husband. There is also just that so many people, especially women fear that a man being fem is going to doom him to poverty, and women tend to weigh things like earning potential strongly in mate selection.

    • lost_faith@lemmy.ca
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      5 hours ago

      I used to wear sarongs, closest I could get, still have a drawer with about 30 in it. Great for walking around and shibari

      • HubertManne@piefed.social
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        4 hours ago

        Had to look it up but its funny its towels that make me want to have something just ever so slightly easier to throw on than a pair of shorts. Like were you don’t have to lift your legs.

        • lost_faith@lemmy.ca
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          4 hours ago

          I love the easy access it provides as well for any number of reasons, plus flying free is so… freeing. The ones I have are rayon, as was the style at the time, only colour I don’t have (on purpose) is white. Tying in sarong is so much more comfortable than pants

  • djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    6 hours ago

    If your hope is to find a woman who would want to date you, I’d be willing to bet this would be the single greatest screen you could ask for. Anyone who isn’t interested probably isn’t worth your time

  • Una@piefed.europe.pub
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    13 hours ago

    Honestly, I love to see anyone who is gender non conforming in any styles and any gender :3

  • birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    15 hours ago

    Idc, as long as they happy who cares?

    Some people might be into it, some not. Personally I think clothing shouldn’t be limited to one gender or whatever.

    • ryannathans@aussie.zone
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      14 hours ago

      That’s not the question though, the question is if each woman viewing the post finds it appealing or not

      • Chromebby@lemmy.world
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        3 minutes ago

        Am woman. Not gonna lie, if it was a stranger on the street, I’d think “wow that is bold! Now there’s a sight you don’t see everyday” and probably look the other way bc I’m not trying to stare lol.

  • memfree@piefed.social
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    14 hours ago

    Young Brad Pitt? Absolutely.
    Old Abe Vigoda? Probably not.

    Mostly it would come down to the attitude of the guy, I’m imaging a pleated skirt above the knees and a sleeveless crop top to better hioghlight the shoulders. Worn proudly on a hot bod? That’d look awesome. Worn with the embarrassment of, say: losing a bet? That’d look lame on anyone.

  • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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    13 hours ago

    I assume the vast majority of women would think it’s a gigantic, flashing “red flag” (if you claim to be straight, at least), but in Western online spaces you’ll probably find a good amount of women that will find it hot or “progressive”.

      • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        It’s a mixture of (probably well-meaning) performative morality (“don’t say that, everyone loves everyone and what they do. Please, my heart hurts!”) and wishful thinking/utter confusion. 🤷😅

      • Lemming6969@lemmy.world
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        7 hours ago

        Despite the down votes, this is the real answer to your question. No the vast majority will not find it appealing. You would be highly selectively filtering your audience. The answer to why, is culture.

        • MelonYellow@lemmy.ca
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          11 minutes ago

          So many answers getting upvoted bc they’re saying what OP wants to hear. Lemmy does not live in reality.

        • luxyr42@lemmy.dormedas.com
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          4 hours ago

          “The vast majority” really depends on the social space/context you are in. Middle of Kansas or Alabama? Yeah. Portland or Seattle or another place like that? Might be a majority or might not be, depends on the part of town probably.

          • Lemming6969@lemmy.world
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            3 hours ago

            Yes, the more specific you filter the community towards the niche culture, the higher the probability. But to get there you’d probably have to filter down to specific sub-communities in specific parts of specific towns. I feel it’s intellectually safe to call the rest a vast majority overall.

        • Taalnazi@lemmy.world
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          4 hours ago

          The “real” answer is not pulling him down like that.

          There’s no unified majority. There are many millions of people.

        • cosmicrookie@lemmy.world
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          13 hours ago

          At some point, women started wearing trousers. Today this is very common and no one would link that to their sexuality or gender alignment

          My point is that maybe we are at that point now, just for men to wear whatever they feel is cool

          • daggermoon@lemmy.worldOP
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            13 hours ago

            Exactly what I was thinking. Never in my life have I seen my mother wear a skirt. She wears pants because she likes them and that’s perfectly valid. Style is a personal choice and I don’t understand why people think it’s related to sexuality or gender identity. Thank you.

          • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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            13 hours ago

            Everyone wears “what they feel is cool”, wearing skirts and crop tops shows people you think that’s cool, and that informs people of who you are as a person to a certain degree (the kind of man who likes wearing skirts and crop tops).

          • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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            13 hours ago

            Of course you’re free, and no one is legally allowed to lock you up or restrict you in whatever way to stop you from wearing crop tops and skirts, lol, that’s not the conversation here. And I’d rather you said “it’s not immoral for me to dress like a girl” than going for the “I do what I want, you’re not my dad!” line, at least it shows more maturity.

            • birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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              7 hours ago

              You’re not one to decide another’s life, or to determine morality. What is moral depends on the time and the person.

              • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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                4 hours ago

                Did I put chains on him? A gun to his head for him to do my bidding? Also, that final statement seems like you’re the one “defining morality”! 🫩

            • daggermoon@lemmy.worldOP
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              13 hours ago

              What is the conversation here? Also, I don’t dress like a girl. I dress like me. And I wasn’t ever concerned with morality.

              • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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                13 hours ago

                Which members of society overwhelmingly wear skirts and crop tops? Why do you think you’re asking this question?! 🙄 And the conversation is not about whether you can or cannot do it, but what that says about you as a self-proclaimed heterosexual man and whether women as a whole will view it and the attitudes and ideology behind it positively or negatively.