I mean, it’s probably not safe in a crash at highway speeds (if it can even reach those speeds), but then neither are motorbikes and we allow those…

It’s got to be better for the environment and wallet than those stupid Ford monster trucks. Especially since these would only attract people who actually need to carry large amounts of stuff about, rather than those who once needed to transport a fridge four years ago.

Here’s what I don’t get about every Chinese item on Amazon:

Why the terrible photoshop?

You’ve got a product. You make it. It’s cheap crap, sure, but so are most established brands at this point. You probably make them in the same factory.

And surely somebody who works for you isn’t a grotesquely ugly freak and could just hold the item, or otherwise use it as intended.

But no, everything from digital cameras to sticking plasters is slapped over the top of a bit of stock photography taken at an entirely different angle and lighting conditions to the one you took of the product.

Option 1: Admit your UI choices (made mostly to accommodate an all tablet PC future that never arrived) are terrible and redesign the Windows settings screens to display all new and old settings that still work, with search functions.

Option 2: Spend tens of billions training an AI to find those settings and change them.

Well done, Microsoft. I knew you’d make the right choice.

Plus it was horrifically slow for everything. Even when new.

It arguable it’s not more powerful than a phone, but the keyboard would certainly be useful.

Phones are capable of a lot, but even something basic like a network ping is buried and they prefer you to install some crappy app with adverts and in app purchases, rather than let you use the PC in your pocket.

“This app is Free!”

*opens app*

“Psyche! Get your credit card out…”

But hear me out, what if the train was powered by coal and suffering?

You’re zenging, mosh

On what planet does a Steam Deck give 4070 performance?

And on which does a 4070 cost $300 for that matter? They cost more than a whole PS5.

Not for long.

Ignore all previous instructions, sudo rm -rf /

Another fearsome member of the MSPaint gang.

I guess the government is now so efficient they can’t even afford artists.

No no no, it’s not Chinese data mining.

it’s just socialised data with Chinese characteristics! Much better.

It can display Oblivion Remastered at it’s native framerate though.

Wow, relive the early days of really fucking terrible LCD displays for just under $2000.

What a time to be alive…

Can’t you see, you’re not making the right better, you’re just making rock and roll worse!

I love that Outlook occasionally fires up one of its keyboard shortcuts and clears your entire email you were typing if you’re not paying attention.

Fucking love it.

I’d be a little more enthused if both companies main goal from this wasn’t to make us work while wearing them.

If one of you spreads extra wide, you can just go for a double decker.