If not for the billionaires, why do governments exist?

Huh… Recent context has really ruined jokes like this…

The only thing I remember from that video is not liking it

Ever see that horrifying video where one gator just straight up bites and death-rolls right off with another gator’s foot? Anyway, this video seems like a fun idea.

“My daddy, Peter Thiel, says that I get to wear a hat at the table. My daddy, Peter Thiel, says that I get to be vice president. My daddy, Peter Thiel, says that my children don’t hate me even when they say that they do. My daddy, Peter Thiel, sa…”

Sounds like they’re trying to put a stop to FOIA requests

“Can you tell me why your face has higher fidelity than the rest of your body?”

You are wise beyond your rears

I thought that the issue was that the plane was upside down and on fire, but I’m new to arrowspace enjuhnearing

Apologies for that not working right :D

More like “not woking,” amirite??? I am also angry about the woke, y’all. Can I now join your town hall and definitely not heckle the shit out of your Nazi fucking ass, you stupid piece of- patriot… Uhhh… “Nobama?” 👉👈

Catch my kids standing outside with the molotovs.

I can assure you they were doing no such thing. They were dogsitting for me. And reading white-Jesus books.

When my mom called me at 5AM to tell me that my dad had a heart attack and was unresponsive

Relevant card game

Lol, I don’t know if you forgot your “/s” on purpose, but good luck. You’ve already received one death threat in under 10 minutes.

That’s fucking cold

Should rob/vandalize other places owned by shitty billionaires, like a Whole Foods. And then sue the police for letting your community fall into disarray.

Don’t back down. If they arrest you for partaking in the theft and vandalism, say that their ineptitude and billionaire suck-assery allowed you to.

Small pickle with a mushroom stuck to the end

This is the most perfect political cartoon I’ve ever seen. Perfect analogy, perfectly drawn. Just so beautiful in all the worst ways.

I guess if you look at it wrong enough, a tumor pressing up against your heart is growing pains

FUCK YOU!!!

Who knew that Trump was so into Hawaiian solidarity. Gonna make the whole nation into an expensive island.