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Joined 11 months ago
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Cake day: August 15th, 2024

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  • This detail makes all the difference. At least one of you guys will have the energy, and you’ll just have to manage your lives very transparently. Rather then expecting things, say them out loud to each other, communication will make a big deal.

    You’ll be fine, as long as you manage your expectations of the life you will have together clearly.

    And although it might seem problematic to your son, just quote " life uuuugh finds a way" and he’ll accept you for the dinosaur you think you are. You’re both grown ups and don’t need each other’s opinions on life, but should treat each other with respect.


  • My thoughts exactly. And how I love this complete dismissal style with the “False.” at the beginning, that has established itself online. it’s a perfect giveaway for " now my personal but universal opinion, also called Truth bomb, is going to destroy your statement" - which in my opinion is just extremely patronizing and never really true.

    Especially when comparing your personal anecdotal experience with a fucking statistic.

    Oh and nobody talks like that in real life, or at least the people that do start their verbal line of argument this way are idiots and everybody knows it.


  • Yeah probably as always only a matter of perspective. Don’t listen to other men, just do what feels right for yourself.

    I took a solid 9 months paternity leave with my son, and I think we just built the best base for a father son relationship I could ever imagine or hope to have. I know they don’t seem like it as a baby, but you are building your foundation already.

    This was 3 years ago and I still feel the outcome of it every day.

    Go for it , be yourself, don’t listen to others.



  • Yeah I think there is a lot of harm coming from that none-altruistic sentiment of having to “deserve” anything good in this world.

    Just like the “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” or how the saying goes and of course the capitalist propaganda myth of the “dishwasher to millionaire” thing.

    It all links the basic need of money in our society (=to be able to exist) to personal effort, and as we judge ourselves very harshly by that standard, we are even worse to others. Especially because we never see their full picture, only pieces of the puzzle they call “life”, and we fill it up with the worst projections because that’s just what we presume: the other people made this or that because they are dumb or evil - the first thought I observe in conservative or extreme right minds in my vicinity. And maybe more people in any political spectrum, don’t know.

    And maybe that is telling a lot about myself as well, maybe I project all that onto the society I observe.

    But either way, without altruism we will never reach that Star Trek life without money and with so much unity ^^