unalivejoy

Sounds like a gag from Monsters U or Monsters at Work. Wazowski tries to wink at someone, but just ends up blinking and he can’t do it no matter how hard he tries.

I bet you aren’t picky. Just the next flight out of the state is fine.

Buy a plane ticket (but buying a ticket offline the day of is suspicious)

Reading online fanfiction is free. Sure, the quality varies, but I can quit any time I want. I just don’t want to.

Searching the filesystem. There’s no reason Windows Search needs to access the internet. Fucking Bing.

“He’s not a citizen, so isn’t entitled to due process” – My brother in law

Let’s go gambling!

Adobe: “We’re here for all our starving artists”

Artist: Buys a Photoshop subscription instead of food

Android’s biggest mistake was not enforcing vendors to port newer releases for older phones.

Android’s second biggest mistake was splitting and closed-sourcing the Play Services to fix their biggest mistake.

• Illegal human fighting rings? Not something we haven’t done before.

It’s obviously an e

We sweat.

Not only do we sweat, we also don’t have fur. Bare skin is more efficient at evaporation and cooling than sweaty fur.

There’s a solution to this. Reproduce before it becomes an issue.

Or you can host your own instance and let the servers send you all their data (instances can still defederate)

Evolutionarily, it only matters that you reproduce.

That’s covered by my phone.

I have a Google home. The only reason I have it is because Spotify gave them away for free back in 2019. It sits unplugged somewhere.

Having the time of my life

Its the anniversary of deciding the Internet was not an unwanted child.