It’s different.

Fuckin’ big pharma. I ain’t sticking Pfizer’s goddamn wantons up there, I’m sticking with PF Changs just like my paw-pee and his pee-paw before 'em.

One time, in my youth, I was up late with a single lamp on. The lamp kept making this buzzing sound. I examined it closer, and saw a moth had somehow managed to work itself into the socket under the bulb.

It was a truly terrifying thing to see. Trapped to certain death so close to that object of obsession. I can’t remember what I did, maybe screwed the bulb tighter to end its suffering, or bring it to shining completion.

My man. Also username checks out.

It’s a race to the bottom. Everything is blown the hell outta proportion until meaning is well meaningless.

Thanks, I’m dyslexic and that’s where the spell check got me.

The “Everybody had one” caption in the thumbnail is patiently false. I think they’ve only found a few hundred of them, which means not everybody had one.

Make it harder to get a driver’s licenses and easier to lose 'em.

I remember like 10 years ago all the boomers would talk shit about texting and driving and all the ad campaigns telling you not to do it. Now I see old farts scrolling on their phone behind the wheel and nobody gives a shit anymore.

The vast majority of people suck at driving and seem to hate it, even if they don’t realize they do.

Would be great if they gtfo the roads, but public transportation is shit so we’re stuck.

The only time I saw one of these on Reddit was when some asshole sent me one after a heated thread.

Bardcore everything.

Beautiful. I can hear it in his voice.

Write, “Return to sender, no longer at this address.” On the envelope throw it back in the mail. You’ve done your due diligence.

Is it going to consist entirely of reviews of DUI lawyers?

I wouldn’t check your DMs then.

You trying to see me paint the bowl? I’d just take my word for it if I was you.

Bog standard sit down and let 'er rip.

I’m literally shitting right now y’all.

Hey man it’s doing its best.

Jesus was tiny.

The grip on claw machines is adjustable, so the owner of the machine can decide how hard or easy it is.