When you can’t have it anymore you kinda miss it. At your age I had shoulder length hair and loved it.

Now I have the Vegeta hairline and the typical bald spot on the top so I buzz my hair super super short. I hate it to be honest, but it’s better than looking pathetic holding on to what little hair I have just to have it longer lol

You can apply the perfect amount of any condiment to a sandwich with your mind.

You can communicate with phytoplankton in French.

Eating vegetables makes you repellant to a T-Rex.

What’s funny about this is that I literally just heard a joke the other day about this:

Donnie dies and goes to hell. The devil greets him and says “we’re actually full up at the moment, but you’re definitely staying. We’ll go look at 3 rooms and you can choose a room where we’ll swap them out one for one, one goes you stay.”

They go to the first room and it’s Obama climbing the tallest high dive ladder ever, then diving into a pool over and over and over, forever. Donnie says “no, no, I can’t do that. Not going in there.”

They go to the second room and it’s George Bush breaking rocks over and over and over. A rock breaks, another appears. Donnie says “nope, nope, can’t do that. Not going in there either.”

They go to the third door and it’s Bill Clinton naked strapped to a bed and Monica Lewinsky doing what Monica did over and over and over. Donnie says “oh absolutely, I’ll take this room for sure!” So the devil says “ok. Monica you’re out, Trump get in there and get to work!”

I actually did the reverse when I was a kid with a VGA computer monitor lol my mom took my TV away as punishment but I still had my console (I’m forgetting which it was, probably n64) and I tried sticking the 3 color wires from the console into the wire for the monitor and it actually worked, but if I remember correctly it wasn’t exactly color correct lol

Google being that guy in the comments saying “just Google it bro” instead of just giving you the answer lol

“Yeah that’s what I want!”

“So you want DEI when it works for you then huh?”

“What!? No, fuck DEI you commie! I just want Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, not DEI you Democrat socialist communist!”

There is nothing in the world, other than money, that Democrats love more than losing

It’s a failure of the system as a whole. If the rights are described as inalienable as a fact of the law then any president who tries to take those rights away should ideally be stopped by the courts.

Instead we have courts that say “hmmm it’s pretty clear they can’t do this so how can I make up some absolute nonsense to say it’s totally ok for them to do it…”

It’s one brain cell firing and reacting to a residual signal from the initial fire. The only thing that keeps it going is its own stupidity.

Trusting scientists has absolutely nothing to do with kings at all…

The last words he heard were “God works in mysterious ways, bitch.”

What an incredibly uncomfortable sculpture lol

Jesus looks super rapey and Kirk looks like he wants no part of what’s happening.

Sorry Kirk, but as a religious person I’m sure you know the Lord is inside of you whether you want him or not.

This is pretty much what I do with every “upper level” comment I write. It’s almost never directed at OP, it’s meant for anyone reading it.

“They’re not rocks Marie!!”

…ok, maybe some of them are, but they’re really cool!

Grok- “It was THE JEWS!”

I’d like to think I’d find meaning elsewhere, and maybe that’s true, but I’m skeptical. I’m almost certainly just kidding myself when I think that I would. I’d just sit at home smoking weed and watching YouTube videos.

But if that’s what you enjoyed then that is what you’d do and it would make you happy. If it didn’t make you happy you wouldn’t do it. So maybe that’s how your life after work would start, but if you became restless and stopped enjoying it you have your background in contracting and you’d probably take on some more enjoyable creative aspect of that role.

In the end your life doesn’t only have meaning if it’s defined by a job title, it’s defined by how you live it. It doesn’t even need to have “meaning” outside of your own enjoyment of life.

Why is he talking about the size of his own penis in that image though?

I guess he’s bragging about how much Waldo envied him?

Don’t worry, “A house divided cannot stand.”

We’ll be sure to fall fairly soon and then there will just be a haunted field instead of a haunted house with nukes lol

No funding, but there’s 40 billion to “buy” the election in Argentina…

No one said you’re not allowed to ask questions…

As for the “leftist” part, this is Lemmy, and spending enough time here you learn that liberal has a very different meaning to some people so I was just covering my bases.

Decades ago my stepmother did this in front of her 8 year old daughter… I was like, ok you’ll be dead, and you don’t need to care about me as your stepson, but what about her?

Ughh… Now her and my dad are MAGA…